I AM a 53-year-old single mother. My only daughter is 26 and working in the private sector. Three years ago, she met A, who is married with three kids.

Although my daughter knew that he is married, she still went with him. They hang out at expensive restaurants daily and the theatre. I think they are having an affair.

This guy is trying to control my daughter. Wherever she goes, he will follow. Each time I tell her that he is not a good person, she gets angry with me. She also spends too much money on him.

I do not have any idea whether A's wife knows about this. He is jobless; only his wife is working. My daughter always comes home late at night. I don't know what to do.

Sad Mum

SORRY but there is nothing much you can do for your daughter at this moment. She is too much in love and too besotted to listen to your advice. The more you nag and complain about A, the more she will hide from you.

It is so difficult trying to guide our children against such obvious pitfalls. They always think they know better and that we are prejudiced, without cause or reason. Until they get hurt, they will not learn.

Your child probably believes that A loves her and will marry her eventually. His possessiveness means intense love to your daughter. She wants to believe that A is the man who loves her too much to leave her.

Try to be understanding and patient. It is better to be able to share your daughter's thoughts and feelings than have her shut you out. You can show love and support so that she is aware she can always come home to you when she faces hurt, pain and disappointment.

When that time comes, never harp on her mistakes or folly. Teach her to pick herself up, brush away the tears and move on.

As mothers, we will always worry about our children. But we cannot prevent hurt and harm in their lives. So we pray, we forgive and love unconditionally. Your child will love you for always being there for her, regardless.

-The Star/Asia News Network