FOR the Malay woman, marriage doesn’t offer a complete sense of security. At the back of your mind, you know it doesn’t matter if you’re the most beautiful or perfect woman alive; someday, your husband might want a younger prototype of you, or worse, the anti-thesis of you!

Of course, some may argue this is an issue that plagues everyone, as every relationship, especially marriage, has its risks.

But for the Malays, there is a difference. In Malaysia, it’s legal for a Muslim man to marry four women. The argument is that it is perfectly acceptable because the Prophet had four wives. I will not quote the relevant hadith here, but the basis is that Muslim men are “allowed” to do the same by law. But wait. Many of them conveniently forget the second part of the hadith, which stresses “... only if you’re capable of treating them equally and fairly”.

A friend who suspects that her husband has a second wife, says: “What on earth makes a mere mortal think that he is on par with our Prophet and can treat all his wives equally? And how strange that some men in this country are so ready to emulate the Prophet when it comes to wives, but not other things?”