Dear Annie: I am a 34-year-old woman and met "Marc" a year ago. Marc is 45 and divorced with three kids. We hit it off from the start and have been going strong for 10 months. Marc is a terrific guy who treats me well and is a wonderful father to his children. I love him deeply and want to spend my life with him.

The problem is, I want to have a baby. I love Marc's kids and would treat them as my own, but they live with their mother and we see them only every other weekend and on certain holidays. I want to be a full-time mom, but Marc doesn't want any more kids and even had a vasectomy to make sure. I asked him about reversing the vasectomy, but he isn't interested.

I was diagnosed with a fertility problem several years ago and was told I would have difficulty getting pregnant. The doctor said adoption would be the best choice, but Marc doesn't want to raise another child. Kids are expensive and he already pays quite a bit in child support. But I have wanted to be a mother since I can remember and cannot imagine being content otherwise.

I've never met a man I've cared about more than Marc, and now my desire to raise a child with him is even greater. But I know marrying him means I won't have a child of my own, adopted or otherwise. I don't know what to do. -- Perplexed

Dear Perplexed: This is a deal-breaker. While many women find fulfillment in mothering other people's children through teaching, volunteering, babysitting, etc., we cannot promise this will work for you. If you believe you will be increasingly resentful of Marc's unwillingness to raise a child, you must break it off. Sorry.