I can see why kids love Halloween.

It is a time they get to play dress up, and adults practically shove candy into their grubby little hands and call them cute. This, to me, makes Halloween a bit of an ageist celebration.

If I were to do the same, I would be the one shoved and the only thing the neighbours would be calling is the police.

Still, I thought it would be fun for the Spawn. So last week, I decided to take him on his first trick-or-treating expedition.

First step, the costume.

I have a very well-thought out method of Halloween costume selection - what is the cheapest costume I can get away with without people thinking I'm cheap.

After much research, I settled on a black high-collared cape ($12) and set of devil's horns ($6).

The Spawn already had a set of pyjamas with a glow-in-the-dark skeleton print, so that was recycled.

And for $18, I had my very own Demon Spawn.

But the moment he saw the cape, he yelled "YAY! I can be a magician!" A magician? Really? "Daddy, make me a moustache! A magician must have a moustache!"

What? That was when I realised the only thing he has seen in a similar cape was not Dracula or Mephisto, but The Amazing Mumford from Sesame Street.

So it seemed that my son would not be going trick-or-treating in a Demon Spawn or magician costume. Instead, he was going as Tom Selleck's Mini-me in Creepy Cape and Horns.

Now THAT is a scary costume.

Beaming with pride, I led him to a neighbourhood Halloween party, basking in the coolness of the costume. Then, reality hit.

I saw a pair of girls who were spray-painted blue from top-to-toe and had their hair braided to look like the Na'vi from the Avatar movie.

Another had a hand-made giant pizza costume complete with 3-D toppings and cockroaches.

And I saw a boy who was in full-on cosplay gear, complete with flowing robes and a giant home-made sword that was taller than him.

They basically made the Spawn look like a kid in a cape.

Still, we had a lot of fun, going door-to-door receiving fistfuls of assorted sweets and chocolates, enough to fill our jack-o-lantern candy carrier.

Now, I'm looking forward to Halloween next year. I'm thinking the Spawn will go dressed as Demon Spawn with giant pitchfork (free if I fashion one out of a BBQ tool and a broom stick) and blood red skin (water-based paint he got as a present).

Coolness of costume: Very.

Total cost of costume: $0. Told you I was cheap.

This article was first published in The New Paper.