Just as we save up for a rainy day, we also need to shore up on our emotional and mental reserves for those times when the light at the end of the tunnel seems to be a long way off.
Wendy K. Chua, Managing Director of Wand Inspiration, author, coach, consultant and facilitator, shares ten of her top ways to make herself mentally resillient.
1. Build your emotional and mental well-being “Reserves” when you are well
This will give you a reserve to draw upon when life tests you.
2. Treasure your body
You only have one body so treat it well. You would not fill your prized car with poor fuel and neither should you do the same to your body. Drink plenty of fluids, make better food choices and exercise. The benefits of exercise are aplenty, yet people have a slew of excuses for not exercising. A lot of people say “no time”, or mothers think, “I already have kids, no point looking good.” On the contrary, parents need to exercise so that they have more energy and health to look after their children. I personally practice pilates, and I walk as much as I can.
3. Having a social network of supporters is important
Surround yourself with people who believe in you and believe in your strengths and contribution. I spend time building my relationships with a few close friends, mentors and colleagues. I give them my time, and they give theirs. Thus, when I have a stretchy dream goal, like writing my book in 2001, their encouragement spurs me on to take the step to be a writer.
4. Keep your trusted ones close
We need people we trust enough whom we can confide in. With these people or one special person, we share our goals, our fears and our deepest thoughts, with the comfort of knowing that they will not laugh or judge us.
5. Make sure you have enough me-time
During your me-time, reflect on your recent challenges that you have overcome, acknowledge your strengths and set (re-set) your goals. This regular “internal check-up” helps you stay well mentally and emotionally.
6. Have enough rest
Instead of spending that last hour watching TV or surfing the internet, switch off the lights and sleep.
7. Learn to say “No”
Learn to say “NO” or negotiate for more time to complete tasks. Plan your time so that you are not rushing from one task to another, from one place to another. With planning comes ease of mind and spirit.
8. Trust others to support you
If you have delegated a task to a helper or a colleague, let go of your perfectionist expectations, and accept that they may do things in ways that are different from yours or they may make a mistake. In time, they will do it better, and you have more free time to pursue your other commitments.
9. Meditate, pray or simply be in silence
I find these practices keep me grounded and present. I too enjoy a quiet and steady energy from being still.
10. Have an attitude of gratitude
In my lowest moments ten years ago, I would end each day with my sons (then 5 and 4 years old) with this question, “What are we thankful for today?” and write our answers in a “thankful diary”. My sons would say things like, “I am thankful for ice-cream, for hugs..” It is being thankful for the blessings and little things that we have, and not dwell on what we don’t have, that put the well back into my being.
Wendy Chua K. Wand has over 15 years of experience helping individuals and organisations thrive through challenges.
With a First-Class Honours in Psychology and graduate work in researching the cross-cultural impact on learning and achievement, Wendy applied her knowledge of psychology to business, education and personal transformation.
In 2003 Wendy founded Wand Inspiration. Her work in raising emotional and interpersonal competence has since reached more than 30,000 people in Singapore, Indonesia, India, Malaysia, China and Taiwan.
Want to learn how to manage your finances and take better care of your body? Sign up for the Savvy Diva Seminar 2010 happening on October 30, 2010 to get more out of life. Click here for details.
