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Mon, Jun 29, 2009
The Straits Times, Urban
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A serial marriage proposer
by Imran Jalil

You are once, twice, three times a lady, and I lurvve... you.

No, make that four times.

Serial marriage proposer Mohammad Sufyan's track record in the engagement stakes is enough to put a new spin on the Lionel Ritchie classic.

The 34-year-old has been engaged three times, each time to a different woman.

Through a combination of misunderstandings and lack of common interests, none ended in holy matrimony.

Undeterred, smitten Sufyan is now giving Lady Love another shot.

He proposed to a 30-year-old operations administrative executive, who wants to be known only as Nora, early this year.

'My head and heart say so. There's chemistry,' says the technical officer earnestly.

His first engagement was in 1998 to a civil servant. It ended one year later when he discovered that she had been cheating on him.

Then came engagement No. 2 in 2001 - but the fire was extinguished when the two realised they did not have much in common.

It was third time unlucky in 2005 when a very possessive and jealous girlfriend gave him the jitters.

If he had his way, though, Sufyan would have been married 'with three or four kids' by now.

Five cousins with whom he grew up have all married by now, with toddlers in tow, he says.

Nora is unfazed about his past: 'I'm fine with it as he has grown into a matured person.'

How have your previous break-ups influenced your relationship now?

I realise that both of us need to share common interests in order to make the relationship work. With Nora, we both enjoy travelling. Our bond was strengthened during such trips.

My second fiancee, for instance, would rather shop than follow me to rock-climbing events. I sensed her disinterest when I noticed that she would rather read a book than watch me climb.

What is your greatest worry when you start a relationship?

I get a little cautious when the other party expects more from me, such as wanting me to spend more time with her. I can't possibly be meeting her every day as I have my own job and errands to run. This happened with my last fiancee.

I meet Nora at least three times a week for simple but nice outings such as dinner or a teh tarik at the hawker centre.

What makes you so sure that she is the one?

I feel that I can communicate with her much better than with my ex-girlfriends. I also appreciate the fact that she is forgiving of my mistakes and is not a petty person. Her whole package appeals to me.

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