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Mon, Jan 24, 2011
The New Paper
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Diva's a fashion disaster
by Jeanmarie Tan

Just when did the once-sexy pop diva turn into a drag queen impostor, or worse, wax figure version of herself?

For years, the singer-actress seemed to believe that make-up can only be applied with a shovel.

The bleached blonde hair, fake orange tan, heavily-lined eyes, bright red lips, big cleavage - it's all too dated and too much.

Why the 30-year-old is still so determined to add 20 years to her age is beyond me.

In her movie debut, Burlesque, Aguilera - who plays a small-town girl trying to make it big in Hollywood via a burlesque lounge - actually looks beautiful in the scenes where her face is paint-free.

More shockingly, she was as slim as her Genie In A Bottle days.

Fast forward to the worldwide premieres of Burlesque.

Not only was Aguilera a walking fashion disaster, at every stop, her weight gain was so prominent that people thought she was pregnant.

This is possibly the worst she has ever looked as she obviously doesn't have a clue how to dress to flatter her fuller figure.

Time to hire a brand new imaging team and try a "makeunder" for a change.

1 ) This flowy strapless emerald Elie Saab empire waist silk chiffon gown from the Los Angeles premiere is lovely on its own terms, but makes Aguilera look bigger that she already is.

Everything from the neck up is also a tragedy.

2 ) There's something disturbingly trashy about the combination of this mumsy Marchesa black beaded dress and Aguilera's out-of-control curves in Madrid, Spain.

It must have something to do with her left breast spilling out from the side.

You're not a size zero any more, darling, so stop squeezing yourself into one!

3 ) She must be the only broad in the world who could make a Zuhair Murad creation look like cheap lingerie.

She moved on to London next and got her girls out again, wearing a black silk satin bustier frock, grey fur stole and fishnet stockings.

Unless she was trying to pay tribute to a Hollywood madam or Mariah Carey, this was just pure vulgar tackiness from head to toe.

4 ) Aguilera's really out of shape - and I mean it in both the sartorial and literal sense.

She hit rock bottom at the Berlin premiere, judging from the ill-fitting Alberta Ferretti fuchsia chiffon halter gown to the ridiculous pink milkmaid braids.

Her only hope lies in a style intervention.

Then maybe one day she'll finally get it right.


This article was first published in The New Paper.

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