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Tue, Sep 27, 2011
The New Paper
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Dear Nanny: Okay for kid to see me naked?

Q: Ever since our son was a baby, my husband and I have taken turns to bathe with him. Our son is now three years old and we are still doing it.

Sometimes, when I'm bathing, he likes to barge into the bathroom because our bathroom door is faulty.

Is it okay for my son to see mummy in the nude? What is the impact on him, and when should I stop him from barging into the bathroom when I'm showering?

- Madam Lesley Lim, 34, freelance designer

A: Your question suggests that you might be a bit uncomfortable with it.

As psychologist Tee Shan Shan from The Child Development Centre of Thomson Paediatric Centre points out, bathing together with your children can often be a time for bonding as children enjoy playing with water.

But the way you react will also impact how your son feels.

Some parents see nudity as a way to teach their children to accept and take pride in their own bodies. Others feel it's really only okay for their toddler to see the body of the parent of the same sex.

Still others think any nudity is problematic, worrying that it will prematurely instill awareness of sexuality.

The pros: Questions about differences in body parts can be dealt with - and your child will have a matter-of-fact notion about physiological differences between the sexes.

The cons: When the child develops a sense of himself as a separate person, and public nudity does not fit into his world view, he may start to show signs such as resisting you when you change his clothes.

Ms Tee advises that you take a lead from your own sense of how your child is reacting. Observe for "signs" of when it's a good time to respect each other's privacy.

If he starts reacting to your nakedness with signs of embarrassment such as silly smiles, giggling or shielding his eyes with his hand, it's probably time to cover up.

This article was first published in The New Paper.

readers' comments
some husband are just plain lazy... even bathing the child also must "去叫妈咪"... super buay tahan... ;)
Posted by jessjessnow on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 at 16:25 PM

goondoo, how liberal you want?

are you feeling inferior to the westerners? suggest you speak for yourself only and don't drag all Asians down with you if you are feeling inferior. Geez..... :rolleyes:
Posted by A_Commoner on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 at 15:51 PM

u mean without teaching, u dun know how to love yr own body?
Posted by jessjessnow on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 at 15:44 PM
I personally feel that we Asians are still not liberal enough compare to the westerners and I dont think by showering together with the kid can help the kid to learn how to love his body.
Posted by goondoon on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 at 15:43 PM

:D :D :D i don't have a son, but will definitely do that if i have one to ensure that right things are imparted to him.

and yes, i will also show him how to wash properly in order to be clean for the ladies. :D :D :D
Posted by A_Commoner on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 at 15:33 PM
win liao lor, you teach them these at 6 yrs old??

by P1, they must learn to bath on their own liao , ok!!!!!:mad:
Posted by jessjessnow on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 at 15:30 PM

such as must treat ladies with respect, for example, if the lady is not willing, cannot force 'it' on her. and cannot 'beat the aeroplane' as it will hurt the vitality. :D
Posted by A_Commoner on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 at 15:28 PM

cannot do wat har? :D:confused::D
Posted by jessjessnow on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 at 15:23 PM

but the daddy can also teach the son about the functionality of the 'weapon' during the bathing sessions. also teach him what he can and cannot do with the hairy bird. :D
Posted by A_Commoner on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 at 15:19 PM

worng leh, normally daddy dun wan bath together with son...
daddy bathe FOR son, maybe yes..
Posted by jessjessnow on Wed, 28 Sep 2011 at 15:15 PM

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