updated 29 May 2012, 11:52
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Mon, May 21, 2012
The Star/Asia News Network
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My husband is being cold and distant towards me

The past few months, my husband has been being cold and distant towards me.

He gets angry easily and thinks he is great. Everything I do or say seems to be wrong.

Every time I confront him, he cuts me off or asks why I want to pick a fight.

We are always arguing and can't seem to sit and talk.

Because of this, we do our own things and don't talk much at home.

If at all we go out with our children, we end up fighting and the whole outing is spoiled.

When we're out, he talks loudly to me and scolds and stares at me in public.

I have dignity and don't deserve to be treated this way.

Sometimes I don't feel like going out with him, but I have no one else.

He's supposed to be the one to share my feelings with, and to do things together with, as a family.

He always says I am to blame and should change, not him.

I'm a person who does not keep quiet; if I need to make a stand, I will.

I am mentally and emotionally disturbed. He doesn't understand that he is the one who makes me angry, and is the cause of everything. He seems not bothered by my actions.

Emotional Wife

When people have problems in their relationships they tend to stop talking to each other.

They think that will solve the problem. Or, maybe they think that ignoring the person means ignoring the problem.

This may work for a while but in the long run, it will do more damage than a bull in a china shop.

One of the biggest causes of problems in a relationship is poor communication or a complete breakdown in communication.

Many people think that communicating means being able to talk to each other and telling each other what they want, when they want. This is a fallacy.

Good communication includes communicating effectively, and listening.

There are also aspects like body language, tone of speech, knowing when to say the right thing, or when you have said the wrong thing, and being gracious.

I am not saying you are not practising all this. But this may be missing, or faulty, in your relationship.

From the way you have described your husband, I can sense your anxiety and tension.

Chances are, so can he. And probably your children, too.

It may be worthwhile to try marriage counselling if you want to save your relationship. Your husband must agree to this, though.

If he does not, it may not hurt for you to go for counselling on your own.

It may help you address some of the stress you are experiencing and help you see things from a different perspective.

That will give you new insights into yourself and your relationship.

Many private and public hospitals and counselling centres have counsellors and psychologists.

What's different is the amount they charge and you may have to look around for a rate that suits you.

But in choosing your counsellor, don't let finance alone dictate your decision.

Make sure you are comfortable with him/her. Do not be afraid to ask questions.

readers' comments
Every woman needs to look good, not for your hubby but also for yourself. Not wear those cover from head to toes. No need to wear sexy everyday, maybe once a week to show your hubby that you are attractive. You really needs to do something, if everything doesnt work, then too bad liao, your hubby heart is not there already.
Posted by Emily Elizabeth on Tue, 22 May 2012 at 13:05 PM
maybe this is the guy......:D:D:D
Posted by 158x128kg on Tue, 22 May 2012 at 12:53 PM

Why dont you all just go play golf?
Trust me... the caddie doesnt nag nag nag... unless you dont get it into the "hole"...

Posted by roadrunerboi on Tue, 22 May 2012 at 12:51 PM

Why are you asking for the impossible.:mad::D
Posted by goondoon on Tue, 22 May 2012 at 10:38 AM
Dont nag nag nag nag nag...hubby dont like nagging....
Posted by hfourhappy on Tue, 22 May 2012 at 10:32 AM
Give one hubby a treat to a dinner.
Give one hubby a treat to overseas holidy.
Let him dont pay a single cent, let him enjoy the trip with you.
He will be happy to be with you more.
Posted by hfourhappy on Tue, 22 May 2012 at 10:31 AM
Tough to being a man in Singapore.

Asked too much s.e.x, wife want to divorce you.

If you leave her alone, wife worry you have affair.
Posted by goondoon on Tue, 22 May 2012 at 10:28 AM

wah, u censor until don't know what u trying to say.. see, the problem with too much censorship will cause miscommunication.. :D
Posted by jsinchina on Tue, 22 May 2012 at 09:13 AM

It's a 'sweet revenge' right, TP? The last round I made you almost cutting out the penis chart and now you making me using the cylinder? :cool::D:) Baddie!
Posted by mystrawberry on Tue, 22 May 2012 at 08:29 AM
Victoria Secret or Frederick's of Hollywood...
Cannot afford? Any of those FB lingerie sites osso can...

Posted by roadrunerboi on Tue, 22 May 2012 at 08:24 AM

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