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Are Singapore men romantic?
by Jamie Yeo

Are Singaporean men romantic?

How would I know? I've only been out with a handful. It's not like I've dated every single available local guy out there. If I've done so, (I'd be a tramp and) I'd be able to answer this week's topical question reasonably and fairly. Ladies, it's human nature to generalize so I'm not faulting you if you've sworn off local guys after just one bad experience with a "Wah lau eh"-spewing, stingy mummy's boy of a Singaporean dude.

On the flip side, let's talk about Frenchmen for a bit. Everyone says Frenchmen are the most romantic! They are quick to lavish compliments on you ("OooH La la! You are so beeauuooooooodifooool!), eager to wine and dine you, and apparently know quite a lot of moves in bed. I wouldn't know. The Frenchmen I've met know how to sweet talk almost everything in a short skirt. Yeah they might tell you they find your body sexy and your face exquisite, but I'm pretty sure they'd say the same thing to the next long-haired lass they meet. And maybe they do know the right buttons to push under the covers, but they only know all that because of their extensive wealth of hands-on experience!

Romance is subjective. Everyone has their own definition of it. We all need and want to be loved in different ways. To me, romance is the little effort put in here and there. Romance is a warm surprise hug from behind while I'm cooking. Romance is a "You're so hot baby" whispered breathily in my ear while we're out at a club. Romance is rubbing my tired feet after I've had a long day in my heels. Romance is hearing and asking what I want with the intent to meet it. Romance is finding me sexy even when I don't have any make-up on. Romance is deep long conversations into the night. True romance to me is also a healthy sex life. No relationship can be healthy without regular sex. Ask any marriage counsellor and they'll tell you the same thing.

Like I said at the start, I've only been out with a handful of Singaporean men. So I'm going to use my friends and my collective experience to best answer the question.

Singaporean men are alright. They aren't the most romantic I admit but they do try to make an effort. To be fair, a few local guys are extremely romantic, meeting the definition of "romance" in every way. (I know a girlfriend whose husband of 4 years still leaves little love notes on the pillow occasionally). However, most SG men aren't really and in the process cancel out the minority of die-hard romantics.

Still, I fully admit that I, along with the rest of the female population here, am too picky for my own good. My standards are too high. I should first take a long hard look at myself. Am I romantic? Do I make the effort? So what if I'm a girl, I can be the romancer too instead of being the passive "romancee"!

Oh, what am I saying? It's exactly because I'm a lady that I should be worth the effort. All throughout history, men have fought with each other, bled, frowned, wept, stressed and toiled over courting and romancing and pleasing women. History is sacred, gentlemen! Woe is he who tries to change its course. It is your duty to romance us, even if we're fussy, picky and annoying. For we are also beautiful, sexy, loving and endearing. And don't forget, you need us. We bear you children.

This article was first published on STOMP.

more: jamie yeo
readers' comments
Everyone defines romance differently. For me, it is about kindess, consideration and love. The little things that make a relationship tick. For example:
- a hot cup of tea on my bedside table when I awake
- an unexpected kiss
- foregoing sport on tv to watch my favourite tv show with me
- washing up after I have prepare our meal, without me asking
- picking me up from work when I am unwell

Those few examples above epitomises for me the act of romance. Yes, the candlelight dinners, flowers, jewellery are all very lovely and generous. However, I am more interested in nuturing a lasting marriage as compared to a flitting one.
Posted by magusta on Sun, 15 Feb 2009 at 08:16 AM
Poor tommy881's GF. If he has one.
Posted by jawbrekka on Fri, 13 Feb 2009 at 14:09 PM
Wait till you are old and dry, and your honey dumps you for a younger chick. See whether you are still needed at that time.
Posted by tommy881 on Fri, 13 Feb 2009 at 13:25 PM

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